After The Firestorm

Two years have gone by since the Tubbs firestorm destroyed our home and our neighbors homes. One of our neighbors warned us and we, in turn, warned our next door neighbor. Twenty four died and an untold number had burns and respiratory damage. Our family and our neighbors were in shock and homeless. Now we have a comfortable home and we are no longer reactive to fire sirens or smoke.

The firestorm interrupted manuscript work for what became “What Wants To Be Known.” Rather than revise an almost completed manuscript I decided to go ahead as if the fire had not happened. So this book is a document from before my life was decisively interrupted and then transformed.

Everything ‘material’ disappeared into the firestorm. The heat was so intense that concrete buckled. Ancient Oak trees were incinerated. Buried water pipes melted. I saved my portable computer which had parts of the manuscript on it but lost my research files.. We had our passports, credit cards, and little else.

After the shock wore off, I experienced an intense PTSD and, oddly, a great unburdening. I had been freed from all things ‘material.’ I had no projects to complete, no chores undone. All of it was swept away.

I began life anew, not in any hurry to recreate what had been. So in the newness, an openness emerged as the PTSD subsided. The openness became an unknowing and the unknowing became a directionless flow.